Be a Control Freak: Guard What You Consume

Automatically generated from the video captions and lightly tidied, so expect the odd misheard word.

So, I'm originally from Dublin. So, I've been in I was in Dublin for about maybe 20 or so years. And my wife is from there. And if you know my wife, she is a Dub through and through. Actually, before we got married, she made me promise that I would never take it out of Dublin. You know, so that was the one condition.

You know, before I marry you, I need to make sure that you know I am never moving out of this place. But when God, you know, showed us that our season in life was changing, that it was time to go minister to go away. Actually, it was my wife who actually told me that it is time to go. It is time to go to the west where God had called us. So, we obeyed and we came. I remember the very first day that we came down.

We put our house on the market, put all our belongings in I just two vans, and we moved to the west. And then, the very first day that we arrived, my wife sent me out to go get you know, just bread and milk. So, I just went out to get bread and milk. This was like a simple errand. An errand that should have just have taken, you know, 10 minutes, 5 minutes there, 5 minutes back. You know, so I left.

So, I left with my daughter to go you know, get bread and milk. But because this was a new place, you know, new surroundings, I took the wrong turn somewhere. And I got lost. And I didn't know where it was because, I mean, this is a new place. It's a new surroundings. I was like, I thought the shops were just 5 minutes down the road, but now I'm driving, you know, for way more than 5 minutes.

And my daughter started to ask questions. Where are the shops? Are we lost? And now I'm trying to act like I'm not lost, right? Because I don't want her to be anxious. I'm like, "No, honey, we're not lost." So, we do what whatever everybody does.

I pull out my smartphone. The GPS wasn't working. Can you believe it? We had moved west and they have no technology. Google Maps wasn't working. Then I was like, "Ah, okay.

Okay, let me call my wife." There was no phone signal. Then I'm like, "Okay, I can ask a stranger in the streets." There was no one in the whole way. And my daughter's now asking again, "Dad, are we lost?" And at that point, I'm just trying to keep it together. "No, sweetie, we're not lost." But I could feel the anxiety rising up in me. Like everything just came all on me. This was a mistake.

We should not have left Dublin. What about if it fails? What about if your work colleagues don't like you? What about if the battery runs out? What about if you run out of fuel? Like all these what ifs what ifs just avalanched me.

And I'm sure it's the same for you as well. What about if you fail that exam? What about if that partner you were with leaves you? What about if that child of yours starts making wrong decisions? What about if you get sick? What about if people in school are bullies and are picking on you?

They're all these what ifs what ifs what ifs. And here's the thing, it's it's a vicious cycle because the more I started thinking about the things that were beyond my control, the more anxious I became. The more anxious and now I'm starting to go, "Oh my goodness, I don't know where we are. What am I going to do?" And this is like this main road, I can't even take a U-turn. What are we going to do? And it just became worse and worse and worse.

So, our question this morning is, when you get in that cycle, when you're looking at all these things that you are beyond your control, I couldn't make the cell phone signal work. I couldn't make Google Maps work. I couldn't put more petrol where I was. There was nothing I could do except just pretend to my daughter that I wasn't lost. At least I could do that part. But what do you do?

Like in your life, what do you do when you know that your job is coming to an end? What do you do? When you know that the landlord is giving you 2 months to vacate the house and you don't have anywhere else to do to go. What are you to do? And this is our passage today comes in. So, we're going to be reading from Philippians chapter 4.

So, Philippians chapter 4, I'll read from verse 4, but we're really going to preach just verse 6 to 9, but I'll just read from verse 4 to just give us a bit of So, verse 4 in Philippians, it's a very small book, but it's it's a fabulous book. You know me with my favorites. Philippians is the favorite of Paul's letters. It is so short, you can read it in about 10 minutes. It's a fabulous book. So, in Philippians chapter 4, verse 4, it says, "Rejoice in the Lord always.

I will say it again, rejoice. Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near." Let me just pause a little bit on verse five. When you're anxious, when you're when you have fear, the thing that you don't want to do is to be gentle. The easiest thing is just to I mean, it happened to me and my wife this morning. Like, I was just like, "Oh man, what's going to happen?

We're going to church. Is anybody going to show up?" And then she, you know, she asked me a question and guess I wasn't gentle. It's just easy to just have a release, right? And just be harsh with somebody. But the possible says, "No, no, no. Let your gentleness or your reasonableness be evident to all cuz the Lord is near.

The Lord is near around you. He is here. He's present." And then verse six, which is the famous one, right? Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation by prayer and petition with Thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends or surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. You know, cuz when anxiety is all about the mindset, right?

The thoughts that you're And then in verse eight it says, "Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable, if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me or seen in put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you." So, the title of our sermon this morning is called control freak. Everybody say control You know what a control freak is, right? According to Wikipedia, a control freak is a colloquialism for a person who feels a psychological need to constantly be in charge of things or people around Tell me, do you know some control freaks? I mean, don't answer that.

If you came as a couple, please don't look at your don't look at your spouse. That is how arguments start in church. But we all know about control freaks. And usually it's with a negative connotation, right? But today I'm going to say to you, I want you to be a control freak. I want you to be a control freak.

And at the end of this sermon, I hope I would have convinced you to be a control freak. So I'm So now we're going to read about the Apostle Paul, who I'm going to say was a control you're going to see what I mean when I see the Apostle Paul was a control freak. So we're going to read verse six Listen to what the Apostle Paul says. Do not be anxious about anything. What? The nerve of this guy.

You know, like the last thing you need when you're anxious is somebody coming and saying, "Do not be anxious." How dare he? Like what How can he say this? He doesn't know my circumstances. Like I Like what gives him the credibility to be able to say such things. I bet he's like in a in the Hilton Hotel, five-star, and he's lounging it, and he's all good in life. So he can say it from his Hilton Hotel.

Don't be anxious, right? Cuz things are good for him. Is that the case? Listen to what he says in chapter 1 of that same book. Now, I want you to know, brothers and sisters, that what has happened to me has actually served to advance the gospel. As a result, it has become clear throughout the whole palace guard to everyone else that I am in chains for Christ.

So, this dude is in prison. And I've never been to prison here, but I know for a fact that the prisons that we have here to the Roman prisons, they're like going to Disneyland. I'm telling you the ancient prisons, like if you did not have people who would come and look out for you, like your friends, your relatives, if they did not bring you food, if they did not bring you clothing, you would die there. It wasn't a place where you went for rehabilitation. No, it was a place where you went whilst you awaited sentencing. So, you're in prison awaiting sentencing.

So, either you're going to be executed or you're going to die. Right? A- A- And you can hear this like in the next In the next verse, in verse 21, "For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain." This is another famous one. But this is from a guy who's saying, "I might die here." You know, I might die actually in this But you know what? "For me to live is and to die is gain." So, this guy has got some harsh circumstances that he's going through. So, when he says, "Do not be anxious," it is not because he's in like in a five-star hotel, you know, it is because he's been through it and he's living through it.

But he has found a way to help with this anxiety. And it's in that verse six, right? What's the way? If we If we put up verse six again, the clue's in that verse. Do not be anxious, but in every by prayer and petition with Thanksgiving present with your requests known to good to God. So, what's the key?

It is not to ignore the thing that is making you anxious, but it is to It is to pray. And we often forget that like a story is told of a group of people, there were maybe five or six. They got They get stuck in the elevator. And you know you know like when your elevator does that chk and then it stops. And then there's like just ensuing panic. You know, like you don't know how people react when a panic happens.

I was once in a car accident. It was my fault. Actually, I was driving, but the reaction of all of us was just something to behold. Like for me, it was just shock. I was like, "I don't believe this. I just almost killed my friends." my One of my friends just got out of the car and just started walking in the middle of the highway.

Like he didn't know like his name is Peter. I'm going to shame you, Peter. Like he just started walking. Like he just like he just was dazed. And one was just screaming. Like when something happens, you don't know how you're going to react.

So, like in this elevator, you know, the elevator you know gets stuck and people react all different. You know, one is now crying. Another person's like, "We're going to get stuck here." And everybody is in a panic. And of course, anxiety thrives in situations like that. That's until one cool cat, one cool dude, he just kind of walks to the side of the press the button that's written help. He pressed it and somebody went, "How can I help you?" And he just says, "I'm stuck in the elevator." And then they said, "Okay, don't you worry about it.

We'll be there in about 2-3 minutes and we'll get you out." So, one person to ask for help. This is the same with prayer. When we are anxious, we are running around, you know, and there are reasons to be anxious, but we forget to ask for help. We forget to pray. So, the thing is, Pray to God. But even at this point I can hear objections.

I can just hear objections in your mind. But Oz, Pastor I don't know how to pray. I don't know how to say the right words. What do I What do I say? Do I need to pray in the King James version? If that works for you, yes, do pray in the King James version.

Do you need to pray in Elskoga? If that works for you, pray for that. But you know what? You know, I'm going to give you a secret. You guys maybe should pay me a couple million. This is like a secret to becoming a prayer warrior.

If you want to be great at praying, do this one secret. Don't tell other people, please. This is a secret. And the secret is, just pray. Just pray. Because, let me tell you, produces quality over time.

Quantity produces quality over time. There was a college professor who did this kind of thought experiment. At the start of the semester, it was a photography class. At the start of the semester, he divided the room in two. So, you had people on the left and people on the right. So, to people on the right he said, "You know what?

I want you for the next 3 to take as many photographs as you can. I will grade you on the quantity of photographs that you take. So, for instance, if you bring me 100 I will give you know, if you bring 90, I'll bring you 90. That's all they had to do, just the quantity of photographs. That's what they had to bring. And then on the left, he said, "You guys are the quality.

You just have to bring me one photograph. That's all you have to do. Just one photograph, but it has to be the best. It has to be excellent. You know, the lighting, the contrast, the brightness, all of that. Bring me just Right?

And then, the 3 months passed by, and to his surprise, guess which group had the best pictures? It was the quantity group. It was the group that had taken loads and loads and loads of pictures. Because, you see, as they were taking loads and loads of pictures, they were figuring out what to do, what not to do, you know, which setting to use and which setting not to use. So, the quantity group actually had the best pictures. And the guys that were here, they didn't have the best pictures.

You know, cuz they were looking for that one perfect picture, which they never got to cuz they were procrastinating. This is the same with prayer. It is exactly the same with prayer. You just have to get on with praying. Don't worry about the right words. Don't worry about the length of it.

Just get on with prayer. So, I will I guarantee you this. For the next month, for the next 30 days, if you just pick 5 minutes in the morning to pray, I guarantee you at the end of that you will be better at pray. And here's the thing as well, as you some prayers are going to get answered. I heard one pastor say this is like, you know what? Some people think that when you pray and you know, they get answers, it's just coincidences.

And he's like, okay, maybe they're coincidences, but one thing I just seen in my life is I pray, a lot of coincidences start happening. Pray. So, guys, quantity produces quality. So, we don't ignore the things we cannot control. We do not ignore We bring them to God. But here's the thing now, in verse God promises this.

Like there's a there's a there's a there's a promise in verse seven. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard our hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Like God This is a It is not a promise that the storm is taken away. No, but it is a promise that God will give you a peace that passes all understanding. Because one thing about anxiety is I mean, anxiety doesn't discriminate. It's quite fair.

It doesn't discriminate. Young and old, black and white, male and female, anxiety hits everybody, right? It discriminates. And because of that, because it's so prevalent, so many people look into anxiety and they try and understand it and there is space for but at times, what you need is not necessarily to understand it, but you just need the peace. I mean, just think of a kid who wakes up in the middle of the night scared cuz the thunder is rolling, right? It's rumbling and it's really scary.

And they go to their parents and they say, "I'm scared." What they need at that point is not They don't need the physics of what is happening. They don't need to be told, you know, this is exactly what's happening and this is where the sound comes from. What they just need is a hug from the parents. And this is what prayer, and the peace that God is talking about, is saying. When you pray, I'll give you the peace that passes all understanding. It's like a hug from God.

So, we should always be praying. And the Apostle Paul, we can follow his example. Like he In chapter 1, he says, "I thank my God every time I remember you. And in all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy." So, so he knows the things that he cannot control. So, he prays. He prays a lot.

So, for the things that we cannot control, we pray. But, this is now where the control freak part comes in. There are things we can control. So, there are things we cannot control, but there are things we can control. So, in verse 8, "Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable, if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think about such things." Let me ask things are you consuming? Like I remember like in a computer programming, they had this term.

It's called GIGO. G I G O. It's a garbage in, garbage out, right? So, so if you're starting with things that are not right to start off with, the things that are going to come out are not right. So, if you are, for instance, consuming social media that heightens, for instance, conspiracy don't be surprised when you become somebody who's who's all into conspiracies, right? If you're consuming like Arsenal blogs and all that stuff, don't be surprised on this side when you're becoming an Arsenal fan.

So, if you're consuming stuff that makes you newsflash, the new the I'm sorry, this is my opinion, it's not the Bible, it's my opinion, the news makes you anxious. I'm telling you, I stopped looking at the news. Like, so I'm just one of those people who kind of just glances at you know, the newspapers as I'm buying something in the in Centra, because I just found that it just makes me so anxious, because there's a war that's going on here, there's an earthquake that happened there, there's just so much stuff that's happening, and I'm like, I'm just too small for this. So, you know what? So, I just I just don't I just don't, you know, mess around with the news. And most of the time it's been good, except for just this one time.

I got out of the house wanting to go get my cup of coffee, and I got stuck in traffic. Like, this was like crazy traffic. Only to find out there were fuel protests that were happening, you know, cuz I didn't know, cuz I hadn't checked the news. But, you know what? I can take that, you know, for just peace of mind. And then another one, "Whatever you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace." Again, peace.

Would be with you. Guys, this is just a truth that's been Look at the three to five people you spend the most time with, you are like them. Like, no exceptions. Think of the three to five people you spend the most time with, you're with them. It is it just what it is. We are people who kind of model ourselves off of other people.

So, if you want to be a prayer warrior, hang around with people who pray. If you want to understand your Bible more, hang around with people who understand the Bible more. If you want to be less anxious, hang around with people who are not who are also less anxious. Do you know Like, you know, don't hang around with some people who are complaining all the time cuz that's going to just bring you down. So, be very selective about the people that are hanging around you. And now I'm just kind of going to try and tie The timer is ticking fast.

But, here's the thing. At the end of this, we're going to do an exercise. And in this exercise, I am going to there are papers that are under there are papers that are under your chairs, and then we're actually going to do this exercise. But not you know, but in this exercise, I want you to list the things you cannot control. And then I want you to list the things you can control. Right?

So, for instance, on the next slide, I'm just going to give you a generic thing, but for your thing, I want you to be specific. So, for instance, here's a generic thing. Things you cannot control. You cannot control other people. But, for your thing, I don't want you to put other people. I actually want you to put specific people.

Right? So, for myself, for instance, I will put I cannot control Pastor Caroline. Right? Like that's a specific person. I cannot control other people. You know, you cannot control other people's opinions.

Right? Put Actually put that other person. If it's your boss, put them there. You know, you cannot control God. You control your spouse. You cannot control storms of life.

I don't know what's happening in your but you cannot control the economy. You cannot control health things that happen to you. You cannot control the Right? But for your thing, I want you to be specific. I want you to actually So, for instance for instance for me, I cannot control the outcome of this church. I cannot control what it's going to be.

I cannot control if it is going to become a thousand member church, if it is going to become a hundred member church. I cannot control that. I'm going to put that down I cannot control. But then on the other side, I also want you to put the things you can control. So, you can control things like how you respond to setbacks, your words, how much time you spend with your loved how much you pray, the content you consume, your generosity, your thoughts, who you hang around with, how you use your gifts and your talents, the reading of the Bible. Again, I want you to be specific.

What you're going to find out is you have infinitely more things you can control. The things you cannot control, they probably are not 10. They're about 10 things you may not But you have about a hundred things you can But guess what happens when you're You feel out of control, right? You feel like you cannot control anything. You feel helpless. But that's a lie of the devil.

That's a lie of the devil. You can control so many things and that's why I said I want you to be a control freak. And I think there's another slide I've got this quote from Manny Arango. Maybe two more slides. And this happened at the beginning of the Bible. The devil's trick is to make us forfeit the things that are under our control by showing us things we cannot control, especially in the storms of life.

Think about Adam and Eve. God said what? You can eat any of these fruits. How many How many trees were there? So many. But which one did the devil point to?

The one they could not have. It is the same when it comes to control. You got so many things you can control. So many things you can control that will give you peace. But the devil shows you the five things that are out of your control. So if we go to the next slide, then I'll give you a minute or two to write stuff.

Trust God with what you cannot control. Trust God. Trust God with what you can't control. But control what you can. So you trust God by praying to him. And then the other stuff is self-control.

I think I had a slide somewhere. I skipped it, which is the best control is self-control. That's genius. It's not mine. I wish it That's genius. The best control is self-control.

And I think there's a there's a picture some weighing scales. I just want to show you this picture of some weighing It's not a coincidence that in that in those verses 6 and 7 they talk about peace. Here's now what happens. When you have peace, your anxiety becomes lighter. Well, it doesn't eliminate it, but it becomes lighter. So, when your peace that God gives you becomes weighty, your anxiety becomes lighter.

But what we do is we forfeit the things we have control over, so that this anxiety becomes a We are just concentrating on the things we cannot control. We're actually forgetting the things we can control, like spending time with your loved ones. And this becomes weightier, and guess what you start missing? So, here's the thing. Just have this image of these two balancing things that you want to feed, things that give you peace. And the key is control.

And what you don't what you don't control, you pray to God. So, I'm just going to give us a minute to just write down those things that we cannot control, those things we cannot we cannot control, those things that we can control. And be truthful, it's for yourself. You don't have to show anybody else. It's for